Do you ever wonder how some women can walk into a room and turn everyone’s heads? Sure, some are drop dead gorgeous by pretty much every standard. But more often than not, they just have an unspoken mystique that exudes from within. I remember when I was 14, a suave senior boy said to me, “Roxo, you have a special mystique. And you know it, don’t you?”
I stood there in complete satisfaction, grinning in agreement—hand on one hip, brown corduroy skirt with built-in shorts underneath, button-up polyester shirt with blue flowers on it covering a push-up bra, all teetering on 4-inch cork platforms. Even as a teenager in Marietta, Georgia, I knew about the deep Goddess potential within me. And I was not afraid of it.
The Universe wants you to tap into your Goddess potential, too. And nothing could be more fun, trust me. All you’ve gotta do is….
Soak it up—all of it. RuPaul said it best with, “If you don’t love yourself how the hell you gonna love someone else?” But I know loving yourself isn’t always easy. The best way I’ve found to make sure that love is ingrained deep within you is to make tiny self-care acts an everyday priority. Soak up every single second of the shower. Imagine you’re Cleopatra about to meet Marc Anthony for a sexy tryst as you put on your eyeliner. Make feeding, bathing, and grooming a sacred and fun ritual you savor instead of rush. My friend, relationship coach Shula Melamed, once told me she exclusively wore heels and kimonos around the house to keep her sexy alive. After that, I forbade pajama pants from entering my bedroom. Now, I don’t even own them. And even when I’m single, I only wear silk slips to sleep. It’s luscious.
Move your hips on the regular. Shake Your Bon-Bon. Back That Ass Up. Moves Like Jagger. Hips Don’t Lie … all of it. Feel your hips and move! For me, this is clutch, or my sexual energy stagnates. Turn on some salsa, samba, dirty rap, whatever and dance. Alone. In a class. At a club. And no, yoga doesn’t count. Do it whenever you can. You want to move that energy around the base of your spine— loose, free flowing, sweaty, juicy, and sexy.
Dress to impress yourself. Clothes are essential goddess accessories and above all, they should always make you feel amazing. I love how different outfits can unleash different Goddesses within me. I am one Goddess when I walk out the door in a blazer and skinny jeans. I am another when I wear a long floral dress. A third when I choose a black, slinky, leather skirt. My point: When you’re intentional with your lingerie, clothes, lipstick (and hips!), you can channel whatever archetype you want. You get to be it all. When I want to exude my sexuality, all it takes is a red lip, dress, no underwear. Lit candles and some FKA Twigs complete the scene. I obviously wouldn’t advise going to a meeting like that, but having your seductress-look on lock for when you need it is key for harnessing your own inner sexy.
There are 10,000,000 other ways to keep your sexual energy aglow. Just like any other practice in life, find your method and stick to it! And I want to hear what keeps you aglow! Find me on Instagram and share your sexy secrets.